My friend* recently wrote that “‘Skate DJ’ may have been one of the coolest gigs in human history.” No argument there. A gig not nearly as cool – but so, so much more essential to the continued existence of humans – is that of the person who keeps municipal water clean and flowing for your home use. Skating to “Rapture” and “Pop Music” is all well and good, but if forced to choose between that and indoor plumbing…
Most any job can probably be made cool. Depending on how it’s done. And the water worker (I’d wrongly assumed on first glance that he was dynamiting something with one of those plunger things) pictured here on the cover of band Men & Volts’ album “Tramps in Bloom” is obviously making his job of, well, doing something with buried pipes, a lot of fun. Doing it naked may be against company policy, but maybe he’s so good at whatever they do that management forgives his eccentricities. As if the front cover doesn’t tell you enough about this gentleman, the back cover has a close-up of his face – not sure if he’s enjoying the job, enjoying getting caught doing it naked, or if he’s about to use that t-shaped pipe-device to bludgeon the photographer. Whatever his feelings, no worries for us, just listen to the music.
And that music is great, partially because it doesn’t align with what I’d expect of the album cover, album name, and band name. Far less punk or hardcore or aggressive, more melody, more jangle, with some great titles and lyrics. Side one’s first song – “When You’re Here” – is slow, hummable, with lyrics somewhat reminiscent of a romantic Warren Zevon song. Whatever that may be. Side two begins with the title track, probably my favorite: syncopated and staccato, reminds me of Devo’s “Satisfaction” cover. “Picnic Ape” and others are a little rockabilly, a little power pop, and the singer maintains a deadpan, minimal range throughout, no matter the speed or intensity of the accompanying music or lyrics. I found that far more enjoyable than it might sound from that description. There’s also a whole-of-band (I guess) singalong to “Someone Else’s Money,” and really Zappaesque stylings on ‘Brains & Bone” and “She Ain’t Jesus.”
It Ain’t No Disco, but one could probably dance to several “Tramps in Bloom” songs, and probably did. Or at least skate to them, if the DJ was even cooler than usual.
Janelle found the album in Port Orchard’s Vinyl Injection as I browsed next to her. Naked water guy silently called to her. I heard him, too. There are lyrics and a dedication** on the album’s sleeve and cover, but no date of recording. There is a picture of the band, and based on the (decidedly non-punk) hairstyles, clothes, and cigarettes I’m guessing mid-80s. That package was good enough that we agreed $8 was a good gamble or investment on what might be inside, and I liked this one enough to keep. But in the spirit of paying forward, recycling, upcycling, the circular economy and all, I plan to trade it in at one of our peninsula’s fine record stores. So take that as encouragement to do some local bargain crate browsing. This cover boy may be waiting for you, ready to keep your water flowing with all the vigor and panache of a skating rink DJ. // J. OVERTON
*For the sake of privacy, I’ll just use his trucker handle, “Sean Hughes” **“The song ‘Tramps in Bloom’ is dedicated to the residents of the Duplex Nursing Home. Jamaica Plain, MA”
